Love is flower like; Friendship is like a sheltering tree.

A flower's appeal is in its contradictions - so delicate in form yet strong in fragrance, so small in size yet big in beauty, so short in life yet long on effect. ~Adabella Radici

Bread feeds the body, indeed, but flowers feed also the soul. ~The Koran


On Thursday 27 September Ade and I had our 4th wedding anniversary. We've been together for 8 years and 5 months altogether. On Thursday the flowers pictured above were delivered. The first flowers Ade has ever given me in all the time we've been together.

He doesn't like giving flowers because they die - very true - but they do make me feel special and it is sooo lovely to feel special. Thanks hon.


This quote is for you Ade, but don't let it put you off:

Why do people give each other flowers? To celebrate various important occasions, they're killing living creatures? Why restrict it to plants? "Sweetheart, let's make up. Have this deceased squirrel. ~The Washington Post


Happy Anniversary :)

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Who Do I Think I Am?

Since I decided earlier this year to find out more about my birth family I have made a little progress:

• Rang Isle of Man Adoption Service - found the number on-line and spoke to a social worker who gave me the number of the Birmingham branch of the National Children's Home (NCH) and a name to contact, to try and get my adoption records.
• He said I would need proof of ID and my adoption certificate in order to access my records.
  
• Rang NCH Birmingham - left message for the woman I needed to speak to, asking for information.
• Asked mum and dad for adoption certificate.
• Mum and dad gave me more correspondence they received and notes they made at the time of my adoption - they have a record of my birth name.
• General Register Office - they manage the Adoption Contact Register which exists to put adopted people and their birth relatives in touch with each other if that is what they both wish. Part 1 of the Contact Register is for adopted adults to record their wishes for contact or no contact with birth relatives. Part 2 of the Contact Register is for birth relatives to record their wishes for contact or no contact with the adopted person.
• Sent application to go on part 1 of Adoption Contact Register - recording wish for contact.
  
• Rang General Register Office - they maintain a record of adoptions made on the authority of courts in England and Wales in the Adopted Children Register. At 18, an adopted person can apply for a certificate of their original birth registration, via the Access to Birth Records service at the General Register Office. The General Register Office cannot help with accessing IOM birth records. Gave me a number to try in IOM.
• Rang IOM General Registry - said they might not have records as would have been handled by NCH but are sending an application form.
  
• Mum and dad found small birth certificate - looking for adoption certificate.
• NCH Birmingham - the woman rang and is sending me a form to fill in. They are very busy and warned that it might be a while before anyone got back to me.
• Filled in and posted NCH Access to Personal Records leaflet I'd picked up.
• Filled in and posted NCH Access to Birth Records for Adoptees leaflet I'd picked up.
• Received application form for Access to Birth Records form from IOM General Registry - may be the same as NCH form which I've already sent so I'll wait and see results of that one first.
• Registered on Ancestry.co.uk - looked for any people with my birth surname from IOM - no matches.
• Received letter from NCH Birmingham - they do have records of my adoption, due to their operating a waiting list I will be contacted in 4 - 6 weeks for an appointment.
  
• Received a letter from the Adoption Contact Register to inform me that no relatives were registered on part 2. This means no-one has registered wishing contact with me, but also that no-one has registered wishing no contact with me.
• Appointment come through for NCH Birmingham.
• Saw social worker at NCH Birmingham - discussed the implications of tracing birth family, possible outcomes, what I was hoping for, what I was expecting, best and worse case scenarios. She asked if I wanted to look at my adoption record. Ade and I read it all. From before my birth up to my transfer to Frodsham and my adoption. She asked if I wanted copies of all the information in the file. Obviously I said "Yes please!"

So here it is - my adoption file!

It contains my little period of previously unknown personal history. The clues with which to trace my birth relatives and my own ancestry might well be inside.

Will the clues be there? Will they enable me to find my roots and follow them into my past? Will I find what I'm looking for? What is it I am looking for??

It remains to be seen...

Full Moon

Description of Mooncup Activities written at time of use - 14 August 2007

1.00pm
Insertion

2.30pm
Towel totally saturated.
Mooncup removed with a little difficulty.
Suction was fine so no leakage due to inaccurate insertion.
Cup totally full up.
Sloppy clots in cup and falling out after removal.
Very messy.
Shook out into toilet bowl.
Flung into sink.
Blood on carpet.
Must wipe with loo roll first next time.
Washed and reinserted.
30ml collected - many more ml in towel and flooding out

3.15pm
Cup full.
Clotty.
Messy.
Shook out cup in loo.
Washed in sink and reinserted.
30ml collected - many more ml in towel and flooding out

5.00pm
Cup full.
Sloppy clots.
Very messy.
Cannot remove without getting hand covered in blood.
Much less hygenic than tampon removal.
Difficult to clean the cup with toilet tissue without getting blood everywhere.
Removal is accompanied by squelching noises as suction is released.
Can't imagine that in a public loo.
Washed in sink and reinserted.
30ml collected - many more ml in towel and flooding out

6.30pm
Full.
Messy.
Tried to just use toilet tissue to clean - as if in public loo.
Not very good job.
30ml collected - many more ml in towel and flooding out

8.00pm
Half full.
Topped up with sloppy clots.
Mmm lovely.
Shook out cup in loo.
Washed in sink and reinserted.
15ml counted

9.30pm
Full.
Clotty.
Messy.
Noisy squelches.
Shook out cup in loo.
Washed in sink and reinserted.
Yuck.
30ml collected - many more ml in towel and flooding out
Definitely leaking and saturating towel quicker than when using giant tampons.

10.00pm
Full.
Clotty.
Messy.
Sticky fingers.
Shook out cup in loo.
Washed in sink and reinserted.
30ml collected - many more ml in towel and flooding out

11.00pm
Full.
Clotty.
Messy.
Sticky fingers.
Shook out cup in loo.
Washed in sink.
30ml collected - many more ml in towel and flooding out

GIVEN UP!!

Total collected over 10 hours = 225ml

Do you remember this quote from an earlier post:
"In order for a period to be considered heavy - according to the Mooncup website - one would be losing "80mls+ produced over the whole cycle"."

I've produced 225 mls in 10 hours - that's 1/36th of an average 15 day cycle for me, and that doesn't include the extra extreme loss into the towel and whilst on the loo, admittedly it was a heavy day but still....

Not hugely surprising perhaps, but from wanting to measure my blood loss, I now find it a daunting prospect - I'm not sure I want to know exactly how much beyond normal I am thanks very much.

I tried the Mooncup again a couple of days later. A day I thought was less heavy, more moderate blood loss. Same problem. Did not take many minutes to fill up. Then leaking sensation.

Forgot to mention - when the Mooncup is overflowing I am treated to sound effects. When I move I squelch. Now that's delightful.

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